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About Deviant Marj LucaroFemale/Philippines Group :iconpoetsbrigade: PoetsBrigade
 
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please check out the rest of my gallery and my Loki X Reader Fanfic! Shadows of a Chilled Romance and it's sequel Dark Icy Love. Thanks :D

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deviation in storage by JessicaMariana

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So I just edited my fanfic from way back when. Took out all that nasty stuff, like what the hell was I thinking back then?!!? I did that instead of just deleting it because I actually like my fic. So yea, no more nasty, except for a teeeny bit. 

Well, not that anyone cares anymore. It was mostly for my sanity.
      You return home with a huge smile plastered on your face. Natalie runs up to you with crying eyes. 
      "I MISSED YOU MOMMY!!!!" she clings onto your legs like glue and it took forever to pry her off of you, even with the help of Megan. Megan became really tears as she told you how worried she was for you. She was glad when you told her that Loki didn't harm you, though it was false, you kept it a lie. You look out the window and find the sun about to set. You turn to Natalie who was playing with her toys and asked her,
      "What do want for dinner Nat?" She stops playing for a while and taps a finer on her chin. 
Her face lights up as she looks at you. 
      "Spagetti!!" she laughs and you rub her head.
      "Sure thing kiddo." you smile at her and run into the kitchen. 
      During dinner, you look at Megan and ask, "What happened the night Loki kidnapped me?" Megan looks at you with a concerned look. 
      "If you wish Miss [l/n]. It was around 11 pm and you were asleep in your room. I heard your door crake open so I went to see who it was. As I peer into the room, there was Loki who was waving his hand over Nat. And there was this weird blue mist covering her head. I quietly move to the kitchen to grab a knife, but when I turn around, he was standing right over me." Megan uncomfortably shifts in her seat. "Then he told me that you were going to go to vaca over in Hawaaii and swiftly moves his hand over my face. The blue mist seeps into my brain and I went into this trance. It felt really weird. And then I fell asleep on the couch and that's what happened. After that day, Nat and I just went through without doing much. But I was still conscious, and no matter how much I tried, I couldn't do anything that would give me a lead in where you went. I hated it, like someone took out your brain and replaced it with something else. " A single tear rolls down her cheek. 
      "Oh okay. I'm sorry Megan, to put you through all this. I'm sorry." You gave her a hug. 'Least he didn't do anything more than that.' You thought. You return to your seat and picked up your fork.
      "Do not worry, it's not your fault it's Loki's fault. All his fault." Megan said as she ate. At Loki's name, you stop in your tracks. Staring blankly at your food, your eyes become over whelmed with tears. You suddenly excuse yourself from the table and run to your room. You lock the door and open the curtains. You stare at the moon and sob. 
      "He's a criminal, why do you still love him?! You have to forget him..." you wanted to forget Loki, he cause too much harm to you. But he still helped you, if he hadn't taken you, you wouldn't of met Brendan again. You would be so behind in the world, and he helped you get back in it, though it was in a bad way. And, Loki let you...he let you feel love again, to know that you have someone who will always be there for you and help you through tough times. His arms were so comforting, his kisses were soft and his green eyes were captivating, it was hard to look away. Thinking about Loki made you more depressed. Only now you realized that you were never going to see him again. Only now you realized what pain he must have gone through when you gave him your speech. You felt terrible, you wanted to see him again, more than anything. The feeling of his leave, was greater than the death Mark. You sat on your bed and pulled your knees to your face. Then you cried yourself to sleep. 
      You woke up the next day when you heard knocking on your door. Light shone in your eyes as you whined to pull the covers back over your head. Behind the door, Megan called out to you.
      "Miss [l/n]! Do you plan to eat lunch? You have already missed breakfast and it is two in the afternoon." You sleepily open your eyes and got up from bed. Swinging your legs off the bed, your feet come in contact your black and green scarf. As you picked it up in your hand, you remembered that it looked familiar to Loki's scarf in Germany. Tears started to fill your eyes again. 
      "Megan, it-it's fine, I'm not hungry. Maybe later..." You picked up the scarf and rubbed it against your face. Once you knew that Megan wouldn't be able to hear you, you quietly sobbed his name. When dinner came around, you exited your room and sat down at the table. Natalie happily played at your feet while Megan was already eating. You look down at your meal and slowly nibbled at it. Even after thirty minutes, you barely made a dent in your food. Once again, you excused yourself from the table and returned to your room. But as you left, Megan gave you a concerned look. You lay back down in your bed and held the scarf to your face. As you drifted to sleep, you imagined the good times you had with Loki. 
      As the days went by, your depression over Loki worsened. You barely left the room and hardly ate your meal. When you did leave your room, you were paler than a ghost and was always sulking. Whenever you tried to smile and be happy for Natalie, your expression was dead. At one point, you never left your room, you never got out of bed, and you didn't even take a shower, and at random times, you would start to cry. You would call out his name and pound your fist into the floor. Once that was done, you crawl back into bed and stare at the ceiling. Images of Loki come across your mind and his voice lingered around your ear. He never left your mind. One day, you covered your room in darkness, when Megan saw this she desperately tried to get you out of your room. When she tried to break the door down, you put up a barrier to prevent her. Two more days like that passed when you finally allowed yourself to get out of your room. Slowly, you got across your room, grabbing hold of what ever you can to balance yourself. But when you opened the door, you collapsed immediately. The last thing you heard was Megan calling out your name.
MEGAN'S POV------
       "[name]!!" I saw Miss [l/n] collapse in front of her door. She's been locked in her room for a week and barely ate a thing. As I rushed to her side, she tremendously lost weight and was practically white pale. I rushed to the phone and called an ambulance. I helped get her to a couch to lie her down. Natalie went right over to her mother and started to cry. Another problem, she thought she was dead. As the ambulance came, they allowed Natalie to come so she wouldn't freak out. The moment I was alone, I called the number Mr. Fury gave to me. He said to call it if there was an emergency. If I understand, Loki was the war criminal that tore apart New York, so why did Miss [l/n] repeatedly say his name? It was as if she missed him or something. 
       "Megan, is there an emergency? Did something happen to [name]?" I recognized the voice as Mr. Fury so I got straight to the point. 
       "What is the relationship between Miss [l/c] and Loki. I must know NOW" I demanded. I heard him let out a sigh as he began to tell me of their story. After a few minutes of explaining, I understood now why Miss [l/n] was acting the way she was. She still loved him, she regretted doing what she's done and she is unsure if Loki's words of love were actually true. No matter how much I hated the idea, I requested that she met up with Loki once again, I also had to describe the situation to him. This way, her health might recover. He told me that he would have to consult with his brother Thor, but there was also the problem of how he would contact him. I was fine with waiting but I really hoped he would allow it, I want Miss [l/n] to be healthy again. 
Second-------
       As your depression reached it's climax, Loki was far worse. When he arrived back in Asgard, his depression over you started was as bad as it was for you now. Slowly, he progressed into insanity.
THOR'S POV--------
       I am greatly worried for my brother, and so is our father and mother. Since the day he arrived home, he has been in his chambers. His chambers act as his prison, our father cast a spell to prevent Loki from escaping. But when we bring him his daily meals, he would barely eat any of it. I would often look into his room and everyday, his lights were shut and he would be sulking. Loki would be looking outside or at the floor. At random times, we would hear him yelling and screaming followed by crashing. By the time we enter his room, he has completely ruined the room and was curled up in a ball in the middle of the floor bawling and calling out [name]'s name. I would try to comfort my brother but he would not pay attention to me. All he would do is scream. We have already had to replace his table and furniture eight times this week and it has only been three days since his arrival. I really think he loved her. We tried to get healers to help with his condition and to make him forget her but it would always end up with his screams, Loki wasn't willing to forget her. Loki...
      After a week, Loki's condition worsened. He would try to break the spell on his room, saying that [name] was hurt or in danger. When I ran to Loki to try to calm him down, I would notice cuts along his arms, most extremely new. I shouted at him that his mind played tricks, that she is truly not there. When I say that, he would break down into sobs. In between each breath, he called out to [name]. These continued for at least thirty minutes until he fell asleep. It was as if he didn't know what he was doing. 
LOKI'S POV------
       I miss her. I miss [name] to no end, I want her more than anything in the nine realms. But I'm locked up in my stupid chambers. But I am worried for my health. During the day, I end up taring apart my room and I don't even remember it. I also have not much of an appetite. Ever since the fifth day of my return, I have not been able to eat, I was never hungry. Today, it's been a week and four days. I didn't remember how I had cuts along my arms as well. One day, my mind started to drift off again but I tried to stay focused because I knew that I would end up forgetting what I've done. All I remember are tears being shed from my eyes. As soon as I snapped back, I caught myself with a knife to my arm. A fresh cut formed and blood ran down my hand. I dropped the knife and held my cut. Wincing, I saw that the blood was already stained with old blood. Again, I started to cry, I have been cutting myself. 
       I started to have cruel hallucinations. Ever time I walk past my window, I would see [name]. She would be walking away from me and I tried to call out to her. Then, something would end up coming behind her and torturing her. The image looked so real and every time my mind registered it as an actual event. Thor would have come over and scream at me for me to come back to reality. After whatever I have done, I cry and sob. I don't know what's happening to me. I think I have gone insane.
       This evening, I decided that I should eat my meal. As a maid came into my room, I took the tray of food and thanked her. I set it on my bed and sat next to it. I picked up my spoon to drink my soup but as I put the spoon to my mouth, my hands stop. My hand started to shake and I couldn't feed myself. It was as if my mind was rejecting food. I dropped my spoon and picked up the piece of bread. At first I hesitated to eat it but then I shoved it into my mouth. Chewing quickly, I swallowed the bread. But, a sick feeling came in my stomach. I put a hand over my mouth and ran to the bathroom. I knelt to my toilet and threw up my food. 
       What's happening to me? I pull my knees to my face and quietly sob.
       "What has become of me?" From there, I cried myself to sleep. 
       The next morning, I awoke in my bed. Thor probably carried me here. Looking around, I found my favorite breakfast on the table. I sat in front of it and tried to eat. But alas, I was not able to eat it. The sight of my food made me want to barf. Not wanting my condition to worsen, I decided to talk to father. I wanted to ask him if [name] could visit. If I explain my situation to him, he might understand. But i had no desire to go this morning so I waited until the evening. As night fell, I got dress. I walk to my door and hesitate. I take a deep breath and turned the knob. As I swing open my door, I stumble back.
      "[name]"
BACK TO SECOND------
      Today, you woke up at night in a hospital bed. Megan and Natalie sat next to you as she explained how you fell from lack of hydration and from lack of food. She also told you that you had a case of severe depression, that didn't surprise you. Then Fury and Thor came into your room. 
      "Miss [l/n]," Fury talked to you, "you will be going to Asgard with Thor today to visit Loki." You were taken back and looked at them with surprise.
      "Really?" you ask. They nod at you as you turned your head to Megan who was nodding as well. For the first time in a week, you smiled and looked at them excitedly. "Lets go!" The next thing you knew, you were standing in front of Loki's door.  You were wearing short shorts and a green and black t-shirt. You kinda tried to make yourself look nice but you didn't really care. As you were about to knock the door opened to your surprise. On the other side was Loki.
      "[name]." He looked at you in surprise.
      "Loki." For awhile, the two of you stood in your position staring at each other. Breaking the silence Loki spoke.
      "Does my mind play another cruel trick?" You smiled and shook your head.
      "No, it's really me." You touched his face as his expression loosened up. He pulled you into the room and squeezed you in  a tight hug. 
      "Oh [name], I have missed you so much. So so much." He stroked your hair and placed a small kiss on your neck. You hugged him back and whispered, "Me too." Loki shut the door and slammed you against the door. Within seconds, you both got busy.

 
Wow it's been so long :/ 
I'm probably never going to use my dA account again xp 
Sorreh
It's two days late but Happy New Year! I hope you all have a great year! 

-Marj

oh yea I'm so happy cause I'm with te guy I like. Yeaaaaa :3
I love art class, I really do.
I love to paint and draw and get amazing results. 
But sometimes I can't help but not want to be there. 
Sometimes, I hate it. 

No one talks to me.
Then again, I have my headphones on.

No one knows me that well.
But, I seclude myself from everyone else. 

It's really boring at times.
I never integrate myself in their conversation.

My teacher barely gives me criticism. 
I don't ask a lot of questions either. 

People tend to stay away from me. 
Yet I always have this aura of not wanting to bothered around me. 

When people pass by, I can feel their eyes on my back. 
Their breath brush up behind my neck and on my shoulders. 

It's uncomfortable and 
I don't like it. 

But, I kinda like it at the same time. 
I like the attention 
and I love it when people give me compliments.

So what's wrong?
So What's Wrong?
It's just a thing I've had in the back of my mind. 

Also cause I feel like shit right now...
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Journal History

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HiddnLeaf
Marj Lucaro
Philippines
Hello! Marj here, I'm a junior in High school and I love anything that has do to with music or arts.
I'm involved with both Theatre and Marching Band, I'm in the color guard. Let me say right now, it's a hectic but awesome life. ^^
I also love really cute things! I guess I can say I'm coming out of my tomboyish phase hahaha xD
On occasion I write and draw. However when I grow up, I wish to be a singer, maaaaybe an actress. But I absolutely love singing and hope to be a singer one day.

That's all for this bio, Marj out!
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:iconkissysaltcoatedangel:
kissysaltcoatedangel Featured By Owner Sep 7, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the fav! :iconsuaveluciferplz: 
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:iconhiddnleaf:
HiddnLeaf Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2014
You're welcome! ^^
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:iconkissysaltcoatedangel:
kissysaltcoatedangel Featured By Owner Sep 8, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
hug :heart: 
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:iconinunokanojo:
inunokanojo Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks for the fave on my Loki! :D
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:iconhiddnleaf:
HiddnLeaf Featured By Owner Mar 24, 2014
No problem! Thank you for the llama! :)
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